Review of 12 Rounds (2009) by Ness = — 31 Mar 2010

This film is so bad that I could not even find a quote and I really don't wanna see '12 Rounds' again...

I'd like to like this film because of Renny Harlin, the most famous Finnish born director. The man behind such decent action flicks as 'Die Hard 2', 'The Long Kiss Goodnight' and 'Cliffhanger', has been demoted to direct B class action produced by the WWF. Wrestling! Son of a muthaf...

What went wrong? The change of the millenium didn't do damage to the society but it ruined Harlin's career. After the change we've witnessed such classics as 'Driven', 'The Covenant' and now '12 Rounds', a crappy film starring John Cena, a wrestler on the merge of Hollywood fame... Not.

'12 Rounds' mimics 'Die Hard 3' and 'Speed' and doesn't even try to hide it. Whilst the two examples are good action semi classics, '12 Rounds' is the worst film that Harlin has defecated since 'Driven'. Cena can not handle a film by himself, which was already proven with 'The Marine'. The action is lame, even with the standards of Harlin, who has been profiled as a director specialized on action. I mean, sweet Jesus... The last scene with the helicopter... Oh, the tension, camerawork! By the way, Cena has to have the best physical fitness level I've seen. He can run thru half the city and not even get exhausted!

I'd recommend this film to all rednecks who spend their evenings watching wrestling, drinking Budweiser (which happens to be the crapiest beer available) and masturbating their pet frog. An extra half star 'cause of the pug, the best actor in the movie.